who speaks to me that way
with venomous words
filled with malice
why can’t i make her stop
l
she must loathe my very presence
for every chance she gets
she kicks me, trips me
laughs at my shortcomings
l
why do i listen to her spitefulness
how do i get her to leave me alone
i wonder how it’s even possible
that she is i
i am she
my inner critic
l
will i ever be good enough
to make her happy, satisfied
to shut her up
l
or does she need something else
(not performance-related)
perhaps she needs my love
even while she’s scathing in her abuse
l
i think i’ll try
seeing her as a wounded, hurt child
lashing out at the only person
she knows will never leave
no matter what
l
yes, i will love her like a child
dry her tears, stroke her face
hold her dearly to my breast
comfort her till the ranting and sobbing cease
l
perhaps then she will feel
seen, loved, cared for
perhaps then she will let go
of the anger and injustice
l
what if i love my inner critic to death
what will my world sound like then
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